Recently in Images Category

Dutifully irrigating the desert landscape.

(Inspired by a recent backpacking trip to the lands of the Havasupai people).

Vector art (Adobe Illustrator CS5), 2010.
Prints available!

(Detail images after the jump)

My latest piece, created for the first edition of Colorvision Magazine!

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Here's my 2009 Christmas card design:

The inside reads:

"The only gift Francine the reindeer wanted for Christmas was the one no one would give him: a new name."

I'll have a few extras, so if you're interested in purchasing a set, just post a comment!

Here's a new piece I finished for the upcoming BloodSweatVector art show at the West Berlin Gallery in Berlin, Germany. The show runs from November 12 -> December 12. More info!

Also, if you've got a moment, check out my interview with Colorvision Magazine!

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints will be available after the show starts.

Here's a piece I finished recently for the magazine Belio. Enjoy!

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

First I went on vacation. Then the largest wildfire in the history of Los Angeles came within 2,000 feet of our house. After the fire cleared up, I got violently ill! Finally, finally, things normalized and today I had time to finish this piece. Hope you enjoy it! Detail images after the jump.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Found in an east-central PA parking lot.

photo credit: drinkmoremoxie (a minion of dR. s)

I found a spot in the woods where things just sort of happen.

I've been working on this one for a long time! Detail images after the jump.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Earlier this year, Argentinean art magazine Göoo invited me to create a two-page spread for the newest issue, #7, Witchcraft. It's been printed and announced, so here's the artwork I submitted. You'll have to piece together how this relates to witchcraft.

If you're interested, I'll let you know where to pick up a copy when they're available via retail. The other art included in the magazine is awesome, so it's definitely worthwhile. Just let me know.

I put this illustration together exclusively for an upcoming show at a gallery here in the Los Angeles area called Hibbleton. Prints will only be available to folks who attend the show. It would be great to see some of you there.

Show info!

For detailed close-ups of the image, see below.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

No one knows for sure
what happens in the thicket.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

The impossibility of the journey was only trumped by its staggering strangeness.

This one took me a long, long time. I experimented with some new patterns, textures, and ideas. Hopefully it all works.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Apologies for the lack of communications, I've been INCREDIBLY busy lately.

Here we have a collaboration between the great Roctopus and myself. It was great working with the Roctopus, and I think the results speak for themselves!

More Roctopus: roctopus.net

Also, keep your eyes peeled for a Roctopus tutorial coming to vectortuts.

I've got a few illustrations that I'll be posting soon, I'm just waiting for the OK as one's set to be published.

More to come!

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Rhyolite, NV, a ghost town just northeast of Death Valley.

The intricacies of organizing an impromptu concert evaporate in the hands of mystical cyclopes. (Illustration Friday, topic: intricate)

I guess by this point, my love for the color orange is no secret. I've loved it ever since I can remember being able to like anything. Weird. Close-up detail images after the jump.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

A broken, breezy world under repair (Illustration Friday, topic: breezy).

I put a lot of time into this one and I feel pretty good about it. Hope all the work shows.

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Detail images after the jump.

Time to celebrate. (Illustration Friday, topic: celebrate)

I started this one with something much more peaceful in mind, but this is what came out. This is the way my mind seems to work this time of year. I listened to the Wildbirds and Peacedrums album repeatedly while creating this one. Great music to work to.

For those of you in the Los Angeles area, my work will be on display this Saturday (Feb. 21, 2009) at the Flintridge Bookstore in La Canada. A bunch of my older pieces have been on display there since last June, but this show's a bit different as I'll be discussing my work, showing new stuff, and offering up a free print as part of an art-show raffle. Hope to see you there.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

From time to time, I draw people. And spatulas. (Illustration Friday, topic: time)

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Double whammy: flawed in construction and location. (Illustration Friday, topic: flawed)

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Climbing out of my hiatus (Illustration Friday, topic: climbing):

As many of you are aware, things have been pretty busy for me lately. Now that we're finally semi-settled into our new home, I'll be creating new artwork again. For you locals, looks like my work will be featured in two -- yes two -- art shows in February. More details to come.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

When the crazy Athenian and his young friend from the bakery said they were planning to open a truck stop and RV park in the middle of the desert, I didn't know what to say. Sure, it was a needed service for that hell-blasted region, but were there subtleties of exquisite historical context I was overlooking? I wished them both good luck and headed, not to my home, but to the library, to bone up on my Classical studies. I would not be caught so flat-footed again. Not in the damn desert, anyway.

These birds are strikingly similar to birds I've created in the past... (Illustration Friday, topic: similar)

A little music always helps.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

My wife and I begin the process of moving into our first house this week, so if I seem a little more quiet than usual, that's the reason.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Here's a monster I created for Studioaiko's awesome monster party. I dropped in a background for kicks.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

And soon the smoke beast began to expand like a balloon, scaring every ounce of bejesus out of the house-hungry cyclops. (Illustration Friday, topic: balloon)

I actually finished this illustration about a week and a half ago, but I'm posting it now to correspond with the publish date of a tutorial I was hired to write for the website Vectortuts. If you're really interested in vector illustration and you're looking to learn a bit more about my process, check it out. I will warn you, however, that it's a members-only tutorial and you'll have to pay to play.

Here's the link, in case you missed it: vectortuts.com/articles/news/new-vectortuts-plus-tut-create-whimsical-artwork-entirely-in-adobe-illustrator/

Vector Illustration, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

I'm of the opinion that working for a boss is not a good thing. (Illustration Friday, topic: opinion)

I've decided to draw people again. I guess they're sort of people. Another illustration is on the way really soon.

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

If folks keep losing their lunches, the whole town will be vacant. (Illustration Friday, topic: vacant)

I don't normally draw people, so I decided to go for it this week. I think they turned out OK.

Apologies if I've been quiet recently. My wife and I have found a house and we've been busily tackling the required bureaucracy. In other news, I'm pleased to report that there's a little Leavens on the way. That's right -- Adriana's pregnant. Come May, a baby Unloosenite will be among us.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

Here's my take on Halloween. After the beasts have feasted, repairs will be necessary. (Illustration Friday, topic: repair)

I get a little sick of all of the gore and blood associated with Halloween. Otherworldly monsters who eat your plants are scary, too, right?

Also, if you're looking for other Halloween-related stuff, Unloosen-style, check out the fiction section. Craig J. Clark and Joe Blevins have been offering up great, twisted horror stories all month and they'll each be delivering two more just in time for this Friday. This is seriously good stuff, not to be missed.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Vector art, Adobe Illustrator CS4

I meant to post this last week, but my wife and I are trying to buy a house, so I've been a bit busy. Better late than never, right? (Illustration Friday, topic: late)

This is my 2008 Christmas card design. I'll be printing off 250 of these. If anyone's interested, I'll be offering them for sale in packs of five and ten. The cards are standard, 5 inch by 7 inch size and they're professionally printed on thick, glossy card stock.

5 cards will cost US $11, shipping included for US and Canadian residents. 10 cards will be US $20, shipping included for US and Canadian residents. Sorry, I'll have to charge extra for people in other countries. Just post a comment if you're interested and I'll email ordering info. I'll probably be posting some PayPal links/buttons within the next week.

Also, in case you missed it, I was interviewed recently by the awesome vector illustration website Vectips. CHECK IT OUT! Also, big thanks to Bella Sinclair for mentioning me in her list of seven artists on the web she admires. She's quite an artist herself.

Vector Illustration, Adobe Illustrator CS3 and CS4

A tall beast packed with all types of power. (Illustration Friday, topic: packed)

I'm pretty happy with this one.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

An Internet/illustration friend I met through Flickr, Goobeetsa, is collecting artist trading cards depicting scenes from "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland," so I decided to take a crack at it. This is chapter 5 of the story.

Quite an odd clique the characters in this story make, eh? (Illustration Friday, topic: clique)

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator CS3

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

The inside of his mouth was like an island, storms and all. (Illustration Friday, topic: island)

Vector Art, Adobe Illustrator.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Just removing some of the clutter that builds up in my mind (Illustration Friday, topic: clutter). This one's probably best viewed in its larger form (click this one for that one).

This one took me a while. I'm VERY tired now.

100% vectors.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Some try to keep memories alive while others seek rest. (Illustration Friday, topic: memories)

If the dark tones in this one blend to much together, please let me know. My LCD, although very good, sometimes shows more separation in darker tones than CRTs and prints.

Speaking of memories, while working on this I was listening to a great new album called "Sahara Swing" by Karl Hector and the Malcouns. It's basically a bunch of Germans playing Afrobeat (think Krautrock meets Fela Kuti). Made me think of one of my favorite bands, Can. So I listened to Can's "Soon Over Babaluma." It was good.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

**NOTE** I'm in the midst of a major behind-the-scenes site overhaul, so if your comments don't show up right away, don't worry, they still made it through.

My parents were in town, so my normal routine was interrupted, hence the delay. (Illustration Friday, topic: routine)

Acrylic on canvas, 16" x 20"

So many things to detach, so little time. (Illustration Friday, topic: detach)

The textures in this one almost brought my computer to its knees. Also, if you're ever wondering which Mouse on Mars CD is best to rock while working, I'd suggest Glam.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

And prior to this, all was calm.

Sailing through the air to meet some "friends." (Illustration Friday, topic: sail)

Feeling better about this painting than the last one.

Acrylic on canvas, 24" x 30"

I intended to draw a moose and poof, it turned into this (Illustration Friday, topic: poof!).

In all honesty this is the best I've felt about anything I've done in weeks. It's also one of the most complicated vector pieces I've done in a while. If anyone's interested, here's a breakdown of the process.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Having grown tired of canned fruit, the King decided to sup upon something fresher (Illustration Friday, topic: canned).

For those who are keeping score, this is the 500th Unloosen post. Thanks for sticking around.

Acrylic on canvas.

One fish monster is never enough. (Illustration Friday, topic: enough)

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

In PA, Adriana and I visited DHL, who decided to dress conservatively for the occassion:

Adriana partook in the good Doctor's Drank (thanks, Ed) sipping ritual, effectively "slowing his roll:"

We watched and laughed as dr. SATAN, who lives a few houses down from DHL, mowed his lawn. Lunchbox of Blood showed us their instruments of terror, talked about playing them, and then fed us hamburgers. It was good.

For my 25th birthday, I received a female mannequin torso. It was a group effort and the culprits included Wargo, Kendall, and Jack. This was back in the glory days when both Wargo and Kendall were still existing in LA. Seven years have past and I finally feel like I've done the mannequin some justice. Here she is (click on the little photos for the big ones):

Admittedly, my painting skills are a little rusty and it shows in my technique. There's more painting stuff planned for the near future, so a remedy called practice may cure my ills.

Acrylics on mannequin.

Dutiful Steve, Dutiful Steve,

Dodge that Plymouth with a beautiful weave,

Rocket your chrome past the lush of Spring green,

All squat upon leather like a plump little bean.

DHL and some other east-central PA guys have started a pop group called Lunchbox of Blood. They sound a lot like Air Supply, only louder, noisier, and drunker. After an 84-groupie escapade, DHL asked me to come up with some artwork, something that would depict the "smooth, dentist-office calm that is L.O.B." (his words, not mine). Minus the text elements, this be where I'm at:

I don't know if it's AM radio enough for them.

Siamese monster squirrels contemplate the power of the all-knowing acorn. (please help me come up with a punchline for this one -- Illustration Friday, topic: punchline)

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

On Thursday, Adriana and I set off for a relaxing vacation in bucolic east-central Pennsylvania. If you're going to be in the area or you are in the area, let me know and we will collude, drink beverages, and make fun of mustaches. DHL, I expect a basement concert and I'll be bringing prototypes of your logo. Sorry, no truck burritos.

Last summer I was in Long Beach for a few days. It's been nearly a year since then, and yet the moment captured here, when I happened upon a group of local Gs keeping things real, haunts me still.

It's been said that the truest stories of a place like Long Beach aren't found in the lyrics to a hip-hop song, or in a dog-eared copy of the "Rough Guide." They're found, instead, in the hopes and dreams of the everyday people who don their tutus and headbands and go at it anew each and every day they live, always striving to do things a little better than they did the day before.

I guess that's what has stuck with me, what has caused me to wake up on so many afternoons drenched in sweat since this day, last July: The knowledge that, without warning, I came upon the naked and throbbing true heart of America's number one port city.

Real people doing real things. There is a subtle majesty to it all that damn near takes one's breath away.

In the forgotten days of monster birds, offspring were sprung from head trees. (Illustration Friday, topic: forgotten)

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

I'm actually pretty psyched about this one.

This is just a quickie I grabbed out a car window while passing through downtown. I'm not entirely sure about what it means to "envia tu dinero," though from this ad, it seems like something that's done by mountaineering construction workers who very well might perform in disco-revival bands on the weekends. In Mexico.

Nor do I usually draw baby noses. (Illustration Friday, topic: baby)

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

When your home is overrun by orange and yellow vines and vegetative cyclopes, it's time to worry. (Illustration Friday, topic: worry)

I put a little extra work into this one, hope it shows. Now the tired is setting in heavily.

On an Adobe Illustrator-related tech note, I've found the root of my computer's slowness when confronted with complex images. It's all tied to the thumbnail previews in the layers pallet. After each new item is drawn, it's redrawn in the layers pallet. If I hide the layers pallet momentarily while working on complex images, the slowness disappears. This is a minor nuisance for me because I like to keep the layers pallet exposed all the time -- I use lots of layers (I like my files to be somewhat organized). But I guess if it helps me to put off dropping 2.5 Gs on a new computer, I'll deal with it for now.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

The large-footed bird strode along happily in his new extra-wide loafers he picked up at the factory outlet store in Camarillo. (Illustration Friday, topic: wide)

I'm super busy this week, so I figured I'd just throw together a VERY quick ink & paper drawing this time around. It's too bad, because I'm in the planning stages for a piece that would've fit this topic perfectly.

So what's keeping me so busy? Tonight, I'm taking part in a group art show in downtown LA, so I've been prepping for the show for the last couple weeks, putting together promo materials, carting prints to the show location, and updating my portfolio site, which isn't quite done, but it's definitely informative enough and functional.

I was passing by the liquor department in a grocery store near the famous University of Southern California when I saw this sign.

A little science for you alls...

For those of you not in the know, the name of the sporting forces of the USC is the "Trojans," named after the "Trojans." They have had this name since before the widespread adoption of broadcast analogue television and, rumour has it, plan to keep it in the coming age of broadcast DIGITAL TV.

While they have been having "Trojans" as their sports-people name, there has been another school in Los Angeles, called the UCLA, where they have opted to call their sports-practitioners not "Trojans" but "Bruins."

Perhaps it was over this point that these two fine institutions of college stuff went to war and became bitter enemies; or perhaps became bitter enemies and went to war. Irregardless, a state of tension, occasionally flaring into real-deal street violence has simmered twixt them for a time that the kids and the wags both refer to as "long ass."

Because of this, new laws apparently have been enacted while I have been busy playing stupid computer games. These laws probably make it very hard for people from the UCLA to buy their liquor in the store where I took this picture. In the past, that wouldn't have been such a big deal, but today's unpredictable regional real estate prices and the recent discoveries about the health benefits of moderate red wine consumption make this one of today's big "hot button" issues.

It should also be noted that, in the local parlance, the term for gamboling about while on the sauce is to be "a-brewin'" (due to the idea some here might have that, even inside of you, the booze, she continues to brew). This sign thus has a second layer of meaning and is actually frightfully clever for being able to efficiently block purchases by both registered students and faculty of the UCLA as well as ANY adult who dares to enter the joint on less than a fully even keel.

Two sky arms develop the land, ironing away the mountains and electrically binding buildings to the flattened earth. (Illustration Friday, topic: electricity)

I'm really not sure about this one. I had to finish it on my 12" iBook G4 because Adriana and I went out of town this weekend. The colors on the iBook are really hard to gauge. Creating something like this on a computer of this caliber is a brand of masochism I'm not eager to soon repeat. I'll probably go back in and fix it when I'm on my home computer.

The seemingly endless parade of oblivious birds chomping his brethren had planted enough seeds of resent, anger, and hatred to animate the building. (Illustration Friday, topic: seed)

I've been invited to display some of my work at a group show here in Los Angeles on May 17, so I've been busy preparing (hence the lateness of this post). If you live out here, or you're going to be in the area and want to check out the show, feel free to email me for more details: chris[type at symbol]unloosen.com

And yes, as one might imagine, I was really, really tempted (in a heavy sort of way) to use this topic as an excuse to draw multiple Neils from The Young Ones, but I found restraint.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Word has it that when the Trojans are feeling INhospitable, they take off the tape...

This is what a close-up view of the wrinkles on my brain looks like (Illustration Friday, topic: wrinkles).

OK, I admit it, this has almost nothing to do with wrinkles, but this is what I was working on.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

The peaceful mountain instinctually regressed to a more primitive state when it literally blew its top. Oh, and that's lava, not blood. (Illustration Friday, theme: primitive)

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com

Yet again, the mountain failed to read the label on the eggs he was eating. Sickness and a multitude of pink, large-footed birds followed in the wake of his gluttony. (Illustration Friday, theme: fail)

I wasn't sure I'd be able to tackle this project as my wife had an unforeseen medical emergency which put her in the hospital overnight earlier this week. Luckily, she's OK.

Prints: chrisleavens.imagekind.com/Monsters

Wellness and Responsibility are nothing without Excellence. I suspect that this earnest young man not only knew this as he integrated his foodstuffs into a thoughtfully planned and decisively executed program for consumption, but that his appetite was ravenous from all the dynamic synergies he had leveraged that day.

I apologise for the blurriness of the photo, but when paradigms are being shifted so near to where I am, I tend to get all nervous and stuff.

One of the many reasons to save water is because you never know when the rare, but dangerous saguaro tortoise will stop by to slurp up your reservoir or swimming pool. (Illustration Friday, theme: save)

I spent a little more time on this than usual, adding in a lot of texture details. Near the end, the computer became almost unworkable because of all the vectors and feathered paths (not like means anything to most people, but oh well).

Enjoy, or not if that suits you. Purchase a print of this for your favorite uncle by clicking here.

So he decided to pay homage to his town-stomping ancestors by hanging a picture in an appropriate location. (Illustration Friday -- theme: homage)

For the past few weeks, I've started drawings that coincidentally fit the IF weekly theme. Strange.

Prints available via Imagekind, if anyone feels inclined to add this to their wall or office/cubicle space.

Adriana and I are in New Mexico for the week. Today in Albuquerque, we saw this:

An entire telephone pole covered in womens' shoes. This is how one "rolls" in the ABQ, which was once described to me as a giant Kingman. If you've been to Kingman, AZ, you realize that isn't exactly a compliment. Luckily for New Mexico's biggest, it's not really an accurate description. But I digress. The home this pole o' pumps sat next to was a hodge-podge of makeshift metal sculptures, cacti, and old crap. We found it after I took a wrong turn. Hooray for wrong turns.

Don't you hate it when trees split your local office buildings in two? Don't you hate it when giant birds come to roost in your previously-respectable centers of business and commerce? And how about when said birds chomp your car? These are my pet peeves. (Illustration Friday -- theme: pet peeves)

You will probably best served viewing the larger image, which can be acquired by clicking this image:

Enjoy (or not, if you please)! Available, along with other drawings smithed by me, at my Imagekind store.

Just a quick one off:

After I finished the last whale (Heavy), I had an idea for a totally different whale. I didn't want to spend a whole pile of time on it, so I kept it pretty simple.

Heavy the Whale has fallen ill. Illustration Friday; theme="heavy."

I started this one before I saw the theme of the week, but I think it fits. Giant flying whale=heavy. A city feeling the hapless wrath of his influenza=heavy.

Created in Adobe Illustrator CS3.

Heavy the Whale is available for purchase via my Imagekind store.

I had been trying to come up with some kind of simple tribute to Gary Gygax since his death last week, but have found myself unable to devise something that pays appropriate tribute to a person whose work has had a broader and more diverse impact on my life to this point than I fully realise or might admit.

My tardiness in posting this crude homage would be even more a source of unease for me were it not for what appears to have been, over this past week, a growing awareness in the media's consciousness of the impact of his work on our society as a whole. There's no shortage of literature, TV, films, and video games that would either not exist if it were not for Gary Gygax's work, or at least would not be as popular as they presently are.

Of course, I'm sure that none of the cool cats here have ever had more than a minimal awareness of what D&D is, and that fewer still have ever rolled a d20 in anger. Regardless, I apologise for the undercooked nature of this entry, especially in light of the impact of its subject's accomplishments.

Another Illustration Friday submission (the theme is garden) and a new illustration:

I've decided to commit myself to one illustration a week indefinitely. I've uploaded this one to my Imagekind store, so it's available for purchase if anyone's interested.

I hope this is a worthy final edition of Illustration a Day 2:

Thanks to everyone who took the time to pay attention. Special thanks to my wife, Adriana, for putting up with this for a second month and to Alex for commenting on every single drawing.

All art created in Adobe Illustrator CS3.

A little bit of a texture experiment here. Mmm... choco-buildings:

Two menacing creature days in a row. Apologies for repetition of theme.

AI CS3 (as if I need to even mention it).

One more to go.

Farmers of finer flower receptacles, beware:

Illustration a Day delivers more satisfaction.

AI CS3 helps.

All vector drawing, no photo or filter nonsense:

AI CS3 and its sidekick Wacom tablet input device.

Another win for team IAD? Perhaps:

AI CS3 (including textures & shadows)

Two victories in a row and it's my birthday. Who's happy? This guy.

If I can bring the rest of IAD home at this quality level, I'd be mighty pleased.

AI CS3, again and again...

...and again x22.

Another Illustration a Day and another Illustration Friday Submission. The theme of this one is "Multiple."

This is the best I've felt about an IAD in almost a week. I credit time for this victory.

Born in Adobe Illustrator CS3.

Possibly a last minute save. Very tired. Will sleep now.

IAD=Illustration a Day
AI CS3=Adobe Illustrator Creative Suite 3 (I draw with this and a small arsenal of Wacom tablet input device things.)

Stylistically, I cannot sit still.

AI CS3.

In what might be the second of my sidewalks series, I present to the readers and accidental visitors of this site a picture I took perhaps only one or two weeks ago. It was an auspicious find for Chinese New Year, and the full meaning of it hasn't yet been made clear to me. Perhaps I am posting here in the hope that others might see what this is and thus help me to achieve a higher understanding.

What I do know know is that this object was there and, in being there, it wielded a kind of power over many, if not most, who passed near it. Perhaps if I held one or more advanced degrees in the more useful of the arts and sciences, I might know why it held such power -- power disproportionate to its size. For, truly, it did seem to radiate, right there on the sidewalk, a weight not unlike that of one or more of the taller skyscrapers which we locals secretly desire strange unions and associations with.

Nothing gentle here.

Can't say this is my absolute favorite, but like other IADs past, it will have its fans. These things just pop out my head. I can't help it.

AI CS3.

Ten more after this one:

AI CS3

Illustration a Day 2 continues with this, another Illustration Friday entry. The subject of this week's IF was theory. I decided to ignore the obvious takes on the idea of theory and go for a bit more abstract slant on the topic. It may come out a little more mythological than scientific, but I'm happy with the result. This one's definitely best appreciated in it's embiggened form (click to see the biggun'):

Created once again in Adobe Illustrator CS3.

I do not enjoy eating green soup.

For the past two nights, I've been away from home. This has forced me to draw using my laptop. Can you remember me mentioning my feelings about green soup? I feel the same way about drawing using my laptop. It's just not made for IAD. I need my giant LCD.

This Illustration a Day created with the support of: Adobe Illustrator Creative Suite 3.

Wow. I've entered a whole new world of tired.

Medium: AI CS3

Stream of consciousness drawing evolves into a fully-formed IAD:

Just over half way -- have to break through this brick wall.

AI CS3!!!

Happy Saint Valentine's Day:

Because* everyone loves the accordion, right?

Who cares. I love the accordion.

All done in Adobe Illustrator CS Mark III, for those who wonder.

* A hearty finger to any grammarian who dares preach to me the whole "don't start a sentence with 'because' crap."

Illustration a Day gnaws into my head and poos another victory:

I almost collaged this one. I drew a couple quick sketches and contemplated using a mix of Illustrator, Photoshop, and pencil and paper, but I couldn't find my Dixon Ticonderoga, so I decided to go fully AI CS3 yet again. It's hard to trust a drawing that is birthed from the tip of a Sanford product of any caliber.

By the way, did you know Dixon Ticonderogas are no longer made in the good ol' USA? Mexico. Weird.

Wish I had a little more time to work on this one:

Medium: AI CS3

I thought about giving her the goggles the guy in the last one had, but as a bikini top:

I've heard people use the term "more is more" without any irony. People of this sort are not generally categorized as "intelligent."

Nuke-U-Ler!

AI CS3, blah, blah, blah (I need sleep).

There's something about those goggles -- something menacing and borderline mad.

Again, drawn using AI CS3.

I'm back:

The ninth installment in this month's Illustration a Day and my first submission to Illustration Friday.

Forged in AI CS3.

It's very difficult to draw a potato in a manner that does not make said tuber look like a poo.

Still warming up.

Aided and abetted by: AI CS3

Falling... asleep.

Smithed in AI CS3

"8"... incredibly lucky?

No song lyrics in this title, intentionally, at least. If "Primetime" is the part of any modern song, it's probably a new country AKA "hot" country track by some dude with a "y" at the end of more than one of his names.

AI CS3, as usual.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, hot girl. There, that quip is out of the way.

For the third day in a row, I've named an Illustration a Day after a song lyric. The last two were a by a fairly obscure 90s act, this one's an iconic late 70s/early 80s English outfit. Bonus points if you're not Ed.

A slight departure:

Old man!

Medium: AI CS3

I need to sleep, so I'm stopping this one although I think more time could make it better:

As I was drawing this one, I realized that river/stream themes have appeared twice in a row. Sorry.

Birthed via AI CS3.

And then there were two.

I spent a whole chunk of time creating nutrition labels to slap on the sides of the cartons only to see them squashed and distorted to the point of illegibility. Oh well.

Born of my brain and AI CS3.

Here comes the flood:

Let's ride this leap-year February on an IAD wave. Let your friends and your computers know: Illustration a Day has returned.

Created in Adobe Illustrator CS3, as usual.

From Wilkes Barre, PA, DHL delivers this photo:

Emmit tamed the heifer, and many a fine shed she did build. Then Emmit ate her.

I've been working up some more of my own material and I have some interesting news to post, but my newly acquired addiction to the Google Image Labeler has been distracting me for the past week or so. More new stuff to arrive shortly.

Nearly eighteen years ago, I turned fourteen. As a birthday gift, Doctor Hot Lunch, a friend of mine since kindergarten, bestowed upon me the splendor that is Barbie Sticker Fun. Needless to say, the two of us defaced it post-haste. Ever wonder where or when my penchant for the absurd was born? Probably not, but here's proof that I've been a weirdo for a long time.

DISCLAIMER: some of this stuff could be considered offensive. It was all created in the spirit of mockery by fourteen-year-old boys. I hope you'll forgive us.

Click below to see the pages in all their glory.

With the Twelfth Day of Christmas having just recently passed, I thought I would share with you a picture I took on Christmas Day. I was hanging out in the living room, looking for something to test my flash out on, when I found this arrangement in one corner. I hope it will be well received and that it thoroughly conveys my sincere wishes to all for a Happy New Year and a Merry Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.

Three faces will be found if the observer is diligent:

All trickery done in camera, no Photoshopping.

Merry Christmas:

This is the artwork that ended up on my Christmas card this year. Enjoy Christmas and kick all of those politically-correct "happy holidays" dweebs in the shins for me.

Created in Photoshop.

This is a nice little five-year old gem I recently rediscovered as I was moving.
I was in Pittsburgh and, despite growing up in the Coal Region, was captivated by the totally

I was leaving the premises early one morning, when I saw this peahen surveying the garbage, presumably in the hopes of getting her day off to a grand start. A popular on-line dictionary defines premises as: "A building together with its grounds or other appurtenances."

This is Los Angeles, so the peahen didn't faze me. But I have been wondering since if the trash bins could accurately be described as true appurtenances...

As we breezed through Liberal, KS, I managed to grab another quickie through the window. It turned out to be a lucky shot, containing one or two pleasant surprises for me when I viewed it all "big and stuff."

I guess the local patriots and OGs both agree when it comes to fine washing and dining. Them bruisers probably pose and preen like old-time swells while their knits and delicates get done, their tea biscuits overflowing with the freshest caviar.

I was reluctant to post this one, it being a pretty grainy crop from an already grainy photo, but something about the one girl's seemingly concerned expression, combined with ... whatever it is the little boy could be doing, made me reconsider.

I leave it to the readers of this website to try and figure out what's going on in this image, because I have no clue. What I do know is that I took it last year, in Dodge City, KS, either the same day or the day after the "Strong City" picture.

Back story: Adriana and I were in Sonoma, CA for part of our honeymoon. A frequent conversational theme of our wedding was taco trucks and the delicious food they spawn, so when we read about a special Jesus taco truck in and around Sonoma, we decided to track it down. I can confirm its existence because I spotted it on the move while I was driving, but sadly, there's no photographic proof. As a sort of consolation prize, however, I'm posting a photo of Jesus truck's market and spiritual rival, the taco truck belonging to the pagan wizard gang known as "Los Magos." Note the artist's depiction of the wizard magically infusing his foodstuffs with indigestion.

Dedicated to the good Dr. Lunch.

*Trigger technically pulled by Adriana.

My father and I were driving through Kansas last year when I snapped this through the window. I guess it's a good thing we were just passing by, because a "tuffman" I am most certainly not.

Well, this is it, the very last illustration for IAD 2007:

My stab at Halloween. I wanted to go for a different, sadder kind of scary. As with a few others this month, I really wish I had more time to smooth out the wrinkles, but the message I want to convey is there.

Medium: AI CS3

This was a quick one, but I packed it with a little extra absurdity:

One more to go.

Medium: AI CS3

This is an idea I've had stored in my brain for a long time. I was originally going to paint it, but it seemed to lend itself to IAD:

Medium: AI CS3

Now that Unloosen Awareness Month, also known as "October," is well underway, I thought I would put this one up. It isn't much, but what it IS is a little something I was able to make with magnetic letters I found amidst the debris in the back yard that the chair picture was taken in.

Some might think that it was just a lucky find, the right letters to make an Unloosen out of, but it was more than that: I went into the backyard fully and intentionally "Unloosen Aware."

Now, some folks think being Unloosen Aware is a trick, but I assure you that it is not. It's a way of being that anyone can achieve via a simple set of deep breathing exercises and a conscious desire to find the inner Unloosenness of several, if not many, common situations. I entered that yard thinking: "There will most surely be a goodly nugget for one who goes into this Unloosen Aware." And there was!

This technique doesn't only work in back yards, it can also be tried in other common places and venues: Men's rooms, Chanel boutiques, racetracks, grease pits, and amphitheatres. The places this can work are only limited by their number and, in some cases, operating hours and guard dogs.

So, I urge you to embrace the challenge of this Month for Unloosen Awareness, or whatever it's called, and to use it to the fullest. I know I might.

Medium: AI CS3

IAD nearly ended tonight as I was drawing this one:

Popping this one out was a psychological and creative struggle. The project is beginning to push me to the limit, mostly because of sleep deprivation.

Medium: AI CS3

I created this piece five long years ago while in college. This is one of the few things I still like after all of those years. It has a suggestive and greedy feel, which may be more relevant to the present, than it was when it was created.

Create in Photoshop 7

My head feels like scrambled eggs. The 26th installment of Illustration a Day follows the colon:

Medium: AI CS3

I guess technically, it's stealing tree, because a bit of duplication was employed. More than likely, I'll revisit this one after the month breaks -- I'd love to give it a little more time and attention.

143 points to the first person who notices the very thinly-veiled homage to an eminent surrealist.

Medium: AI CS3

A quick one, a bit darker and simpler than usual:

Medium: AI CS3

Near, far. Near, far. I guess I like the whole "wide-angle" dynamic.

Medium: AI CS3

This is actually an artists rendering of what I did on my summer vaccation.
Created in Adobe Illustrator 10

Titles are a bit of an afterthought, if it wasn't obvious already.

This one took a lot longer than I intended.

Medium: AI CS3

IAD 11, Open, was a quick sketch finished within a few minutes. I liked the idea and wanted to give it the full Adobe Illustrator treatment:

Although I'm pleased with the results from an artistic standpoint, I can't say it's one of my favorites. But I'm sure, just like the one with the pipes, a bunch of people will like it.

Here's another Illustration a Day entry. Only eleven to go.

I guess it's no secret that I'm a big fan of modernist illustration, specifically cartoon-type illustration. I try not to be too derivative, but I realize that I probably come pretty close to betraying my influences sometimes.

Medium: AI CS3

This one's dedicated to Dungeon Master Wargo:

Icosahedron, give me resolve.

Complimentary colors make-um file huge, even after chief's compression ceremony:

Medium: AI CS3 (again)

It's the 17th, a very special day for Unloosen "dot" com, and to mark the occasion I have dug deep into my digital image files ("pictures" in the local parlance) to find a suitable photo.

What this photo is actually suitable for is anyone's guess.

I suppose it serves as a good example of how busy the sidewalks in Los Angeles are. It's why we seldom look up, there's so much to read and learn. I know I originally took the picture thinking that one of the coming months was bound to have a 17th day in it and that it might be fun to make a big deal and all about it.

Not only has it happened but, by George, it's a big one! And by "by George" I mean literally BY George. Whatever the 17th is about (and only Chris can tell you, because it's his website, after all) it is because of George being somewhere ("here," according to the sidewalk) that we can even have the courage to address these meaty issues.

If this sounds vague, it's because I never really new this George. This apparently entitles me to try and "ki" his "fss." Now "fss" is obviously just that, I won't insult the regulars here with an unnecessary explanation of that.

The real mystery here is "ki." Is he suggesting we "key" his "fss?" I hope not, because that would be rude. This means the only other thing it could be is a regional spelling of "chi." This doesn't make a whole lot of sense until one remembers that much from the distant East is not only cool, but very mysterious.

And then there's all those other symbols! I have no idea what those are supposed to be about, man, not even a feather-dusting of a clue. But then, that's what our big city sidewalks are like -- one big pedestrian Da Vinci Code.

"The box! I choose the box!"

"OK, let's see what's in the box."

(A few of you know what comes next.)

Medium: AI CS3

Given a little extra time, I think this one could be even better. Click on it to see the bigger version; for this one, it's quite necessary:

But this is illustration a day. I'll have to make the changes and post it during illustration as you please.

Medium: AI CS3 (Adobe Illustrator CS3, for those of you who may have forgotten.)

A bit of a Mr. Chompins redux:

Mr. Chompins, you see, takes to the nighttime skies in pursuit of misbehaving, disrespectful children, whom he eats.

Medium: AI CS3

Illustration a day continues with BANINJA.

Textures: PS CS3
Illustration: AI CS3

Request filled:

I didn't comply 100% with Alex's original request ("I request a picture of an astronaut with space-rockets lined up for launch behind him, and behind them, a blue sky. The astronaut should also be holding a fresh, hot pie of some sort. Maybe there should be bikini-clad graduate students reflected in his visor, washing an official NASA pie truck."), but I dare say I improved on it. You be the judge.

Medium: AI CS3 (but of course!)

More (click it to see the biggun'):

Medium: AI CS3

When I was in Thailand a few years ago, I ran across a mural detailing the Ramakien, a mythology imported from India. Part of the mural depicts a scene in which one of the heroic characters (Hanuman, I think) expands his own head until it is the size of a building. He does this to disguise himself. People walk into his mouth and they don't realize it's alive. This idea has become a minor obsession of mine over the years. I started drawing a stream-of-consciousness piece and it crept in (or out, or whatever) again:

Medium: Pencil (Dixon Ticonderoga!) and Paper

Another in the style of Feeshes:

Textures: PS CS3
Medium: AI CS3

In the back yard of a house I was cleaning, there was this chair. It was an empty chair.

There, amidst the rubble and cat food, my hands sweated inside my rubber gloves as I wondered who had sat in that chair. It was a pretty good chair, which got me to thinking that another thing to ponder would be: who would later sit in that chair?

Sitting is oft enjoyed by all or most and the idea that any number of folk both grand and base might have sat there, or might sit there, lent a kind of solemnity to the place.

Might this be the place of rest for a king? Or perhaps a fashion designer? It might even provide rest for the other, less relevant, members of our society.

I apologise for the misleading title... The chair wasn't so empty after all.

I don't know why I keep going back to themes of oral hygiene; I've got good teeth and I've never feared the dentist. Maybe Dental Mania has indeed taken hold.

Medium: AI CS3

Media: Photoshop CS3 & AI CS3

Medium: AI CS3

Ironic utensils should be the required desktop background images on every computer.

"No way!?" says ye.

"WAY!" I exclaim, "So way!"

Medium: AI CS3
Available in other sizes and desktop-background-friendly dimensions upon request.

I had this idea... a forest made of all metal scraps. So I started drawing this tree and it ended up being a torturous mess. The effect I created to give the pipes dimension, in cooperation with a light drop shadow (for depth) crashed my computer about a dozen times. So I wrapped this one up and called it quits.

To be entirely honest, it doesn't fit into what I normally like to do, but here it is anyway, my very own Maxwell's Silver Hammer.

Medium: AI CS3
Text added for feeling.

Medium: Pencil & Paper

Illustration a Day continues with...

Medium: AI CS3

Any requests?

Media: Pencil & Paper/AI CS3

October is here, which means the second annual Unloosen Awareness Month is also here. This year, to celebrate the awareness, I've decided to post a new illustration every day for the next 31 days. I figured I might as well start things off right, so here goes:

Medium: Adobe Illustrator CS3

There's been some debate over whether or not a certain pen in a certain photograph posted to this site earlier is really gianormous. I submit this image as some kind of proof that the pen in question is indeed of the gianormous sort.

"...and then I ponder again the loneliness of the office supplies department."

Guard dogs not working anymore? Try the NEW Guard Jesus.

I wonder... did China strike a deal with the Georgia Department of Agriculture?

Another Dave Tamkus find, again from the Coal Region of PA. - Chris

Upon a recent visit to the local Weis grocery store on the day before Father's Day, I stumbled across this cake. I thought to myself, "No, it can't be what I think it is. Not for Father's Day. Can it?" I knew what I thought it was, but for the life of me I couldn't think of any rational thing it was SUPPOSED to be. I have since been in contact with a customer service representative from the store and I have found out what it was intended, albeit poorly conveyed, to be. I have shown this pic to several people and no one could come up with what it is supposed to be. Can you? When you give up just let me know.

(sorry for the quality, I took the pic with a camera phone)

Boba Fett didn't die in the Sarlacc's pit. Few days go by where doesn't wish he had, though. Singles Night at the Elks Lodge eases the pain for a while.

The fact that I even have such a picture in my files could partly explain why I am home alone on a Saturday night.

I was recently in Iceland and found myself looking at some amazing things in such a small portion of a rather small country. One of these things was the waterfall Gullfoss, or Golden Falls. The scenery of Iceland is unbelievable, and I have plenty of other photos to prove it.

These dolls stood behind glass in an old mission museum in San Juan Bautista, CA. Unfortunately I couldn't get a better angle on it, but yes, that is a skull she's stepping on. Seemed like a good one for Friday the 13th.

San Francisco. Chinatown. Normal?

Maybe he's talking to The Gracklecleaver?

Coming back from dinner in Little Tokyo, I saw this from the car I was riding in with boys.

Words escape me and I am left with the realisation that it will take a cleverer soul than I to write the story of the time when Earth was called Plushland and all its most pious denizens strove for nothing more than than to bounce unto Glory.

Or how Glory was in a truck.

A truck behind razor wire.

Between the slaying of Jarvis the Unhinged and the supping upon pie with great plum-hued Mifflin, there was a proud and mighty moment where The Gracklecleaver did speak into the Elf Queen's Tiny Box and had discourse with one representing the celebrated Round Table itself.

What he heard did please him so. For, despite being a barbarian with few "smarttes of the booke," as Mifflin would say, he had been in enough pie fellowships to know that "Chicago-style" meant that the wee knife on his bracer would finally be put to good use.

At Pleasure Faire, I did happen upon the two great adventure-seekers enjoying the evening's repast. A light and pleasant moment purchased, no doubt, with fire and steel ... and ancient magicks ... earlier upon that very day.

As all kind and rational folk take great pleasure at the sight of a good wizard at rest (and only slightly less-great pleasure at the sight of a barbarian doing the same), I thought it most fitting and proper to share this captured moment with all who should fare this way.

Dave Tamkus, a long-time reader heralding from the Pork Pony days, bestows upon us his first-ever Unloosen submission. Like Katy's photo, Dave's transmission originates from the Pennsylvania Coal Region. Welcome to the other side of Unloosen, Dave. -Chris

The following sign has been up on Tioga St. [in Shamokin, PA] for about a week now. Personally, I won't be attending. I don't know how to plan my evening around "6-TiL." Something about the hand drawn letters tells me if you eat the caked potato being served "FRiDAY," you are going to have a long Saturday. Another interesting fact, the arrow isn't really pointing to a building. I would assume that you just have to show up and look for a line. Which actually reminds me of a joke. Q: What has 60 legs and 7 teeth? A: The potato cake line at Transfig block party.

This one was submitted by an Unloosen reader, Katy Kirkpatrick from the great state of Pennsylvania. Welcome to the Unloosen fold, Katy. -Chris

This is a representation of a true, central-Pennsylvanian, Coal Region gem. After months of driving past it and laughing to myself each time, I decided one day the time had come to pull off the side of the road and make record of this spectacle.

Spring into summer in this season's hottest attire, only at Target.

Above: Alex models the freshest warm-weather fashions.

Realising I couldn't compete with Chris's graffiti picture in quality, I scoured the city to find that which would enable me to try and match it with sheer quantity...

This is the final official installment of my Western Avenue photo series. I may post a collection of odds and ends, but this is the last of the good ones.

Taco must be proud of his fine patio. Although the patio isn't really shaped like the twelfth letter of the alphabet, but its tortilla-wrapped goodies do its namesake justice.

No Richard Gere jokes, please.

Schwarzes und Weiß!

I'm not, nor do I think I ever will be a fan of tags or taggers, but this one accidentally turned out OK. Once a mural depicting the streets of Los Angeles, this slab of concrete has become a canvas for numerous graffiti "artists" who've scrawled everything from their signature scribbles to new buildings on the multi-colored wall. Only a few bits of the original art remain. I liked this particular portion because it looks like the bus is escaping the choke of graffiti closing in on it. And the police are courageously driving full-speed into vandalism's neon maw. GO 5-0!

Even greater wonders lay beyond those windows. If only I had remembered my polarizer that day.

Note the clever reappropriation of letters.

I'm back from Hawaii, so I'm continuing the Western Ave. series with this gem. I'm not really sure what this store's called or what it sells because my Korean's a bit rusty, but I found the shop and its resident Kong entertaining, so here it is.

Adriana and I are in Hawaii right now, Oahu, to be exact. We ate at a Hawaiian restaurant today and we tried poi. To quote our waiter, "It tastes kinda like glue. I like it."

This one doesn't fit the absurd/funny profile so much (well, at all), but I liked the way it came out so I'm plopping it up here as an intermediary step between some of the other Western Ave. photos.

Western Ave. is big mix of architectural styles, but one aspect of L.A.'s premiere tenets of urban design reigns this mighty slab of asphalt: a perpetual cycle of tearing down and rebuilding with almost no regard for history or preservation. In Los Angeles, "new" is always the new black.

Western Avenue spans a good north-to-south swath of Los Angeles and along the way samples the city's mish-mash of culture, high and low. Botanica Amazonica sits on the northern edge of L.A.'s Korea Town in a transitional area populated by a mix of mostly Latinos and, of course, Koreans.

I highly suggest you click the above photo and view the larger one for greatest impact.

These are probably the last of the Chinese New Year photos I'll post this year. This was one of multiple "Miss Photogenic" winners participating in the parade. I have no idea what makes them Miss Photogenics and I'm not sure why all the Miss Photogenics were Asian, but they were.

I was pretty happy with this trio of photos, but I can't choose a favorite. There's something about each one that works. Which one is best in your book? Do they all blow the solar winds? Click below and let your inner judge guide you.

Click the photo for size and impact. Flame on!

Never steal a mullet-wearing warrior's I.C. Lite.

I consider myself a fairly open-minded person, but when I have children I will consistently discourage them from choosing lives as a clowns.

He thinks he can fly.

Two posts in one day! It's been a while since last I posted, but things have been busy. Here, for your enjoyment is the result of an experiment with the new flash I bought for my camera. Scary stuff, indeed.

Last weekend, I revisited one of my favorite hiking trails for the first time in nearly five years. Along the trail, nestled in a canyon, are the remnants of a World-War-II era "settlement for German Americans." It was a completely self-sustained community with stables, gardens, and a power generation facility. After these National "Bocialists" moved out, it became a commune. Now it's just a rotting, mangled mess that seems to attract a never-ending parade of taggers. The above photo is a close-up of one of the steel beams that formed the walls. Click below for more metallic carnage, sans comments (I'm not feeling well today).

Red pirate mannequin? On what filth-ridden vessel does ye sail?

Complicated and untrue explanations aside, Ed, my girlfriend Adriana, mystery Unloosen writer, a red mannequin, and I met in Chicago. Good times were had, photos were taken. Some of those photos required an eye patch. Click below for the evidence.

Given the infamous nature of Chicago's Superdawg, I'm pretty sure the hell's been completely photographed out of these two demonic wieners. But I have a penchant for anthropomorphic food stuffs so I don't care.

The Nativity according to Syd Barrett.

Took my new camera and a new lens out for a test drive in downtown LA on Sunday and I felt compelled to stop into Mitsuwa, one of my all-time favorite supermarkets. Mitsuwa is a Japanese supermarket filled with excellent imports from the land of Godzilla. What does a young Japanese man do when he needs to impress the ladies? Why he colors his hair, of course. What does he use to color his hair?

It was a toss-up between this and another mens' hair dye called 'Gatsby.' Kind of makes our silly American 'Just for Men' formulas seem flaccid by comparison, doesn't it?

My girlfriend and I were doing a little Christmas shopping in LA's Chinatown when we chanced upon a street performance. Two men demonstrated both their Shaolin kungfu skills and their extraordinary pelvic might. Luckily, I had my camera.

Click any of the photos for a bigger version. Be sure to read on and view the rest because they only get better.

Click the amply-sized Henry above for an even bigger one.

Apologies for the lack of new material recently. I've been working on a longer-form story which may or may not appear here. More everything in the near future. Enjoy the holiday.

You do not know how wonderful it was to learn that I, Rick DeMott, was celebrated as one of the "other" guys on Unloosen.com. It is so true that I could not handle the fame and recognition that Unloosen thrust upon me and so left the world wide web to become a paparazzi.

When my Hollywood friends learned of my Unloosen honor they too wanted to join in on the fun.

Here's me telling Toby to pose like distinguished Millard Fillmore.

With the word out more of my Hollywood friends will want to be featured on Unloosen soon too.

Here's one specifically for an old friend of mine, Jeff AKA Dr. Hot Lunch. This is not too far from his childhood home in east-central PA. Notice the care these cultured folks have put into the presentation of this "Metal Mementos" installation, meticulously constructed on their front yard. They deserve an NEA grant if nothing else. Keep making PA beautiful, lawn artists.

This was given to me as a birthday present a few years ago. It is a marvel of mangled English. Behold, the product of Chinese translation, design, and engineering:

Yes, in case you were wondering what class of vehicle this was, it is the ever-so desirable "Advanced Grade of Contest Model."

This bold illustration entices English-speaking youth everywhere to feel the power and luxury that is an Awning Car.

One of my life goals was finally fulfilled on Wednesday night when my friend Alex and I met Chris Elliot. In this photo, the king of absurd comedy is pointing to his cadre of Alsatian bodyguards, each of which, he described, would kick my ass if I didn't leave at that very moment. I counted twenty-four of the the brutes, but there may have been a few little ones hiding in the stovepipe-leg pants of the big guys.

Alex was so scared by the impending doom that he wet himself.

A little speck of the dark side shows through. Is this when he decided to slaughter children?

More of Gary Baseman's Tobies, this time scaling a wall.

These "Tobies" are a creation of an artist named Gary Baseman. They are currently on display at an art museum in Laguna Beach, CA.

Yeah, I don't know either.

I was visiting New York and I noticed that the Fryman had followed me. The Big Apple seems to have taken a bite out of him, however. He's now missing an arm, has a bunch of holes on his body, and there's a bunch of sticker residue on him. Poor Fryman.

There's nothing more inviting than a giant, frozen, vivisected pregnant woman in her third trimester.

Over the past few years, I've really become a fan of the exclamation point.

I wish couples at weddings got hit in the face with stuff more often. That would make weddings excellent.

As any of my friends can tell you, I am guilty of using the word 'awesome' in conversation with a frequency that should not be permitted by law (at least with concern to a 30-year-old man). This sight was truly awesome; I went on a hike north of Seattle in search of an area called the Big Four Ice Caves. What I found instead were avalanches. They sounded like thunder and looked like waterfalls of snow pouring off of the mountain. For a little bit of perspective, look at the pine tree in the foreground and then look at the little spiky 'hairs' on the mountain above the avalanche. Yep, those are more of the same pine trees.

This is in the part of Seattle that is underground. They raised the city up one story or so after poop geysers started gushing out of toilets due to "technical difficulties" (i.e. little forethought, laziness, and a complete lack of civil engineering).

There'll be a cool avalanche photo later this week.

Montano de Oro State Park in Los Osos, CA (central coast of CA).

When I was in Seattle, WA, I ran into this masochistic cone o' fries. I suspected he was made by the same sculptor/company that made Hot Dog Boy and I was later informed (by the fry man's owner) that I was correct.

I saw this statue at an old Spanish mission in San Juan Capistrano, CA. It depicts a priest "teaching" a scantily-clad native boy. Draw your own conclusions. If demand exists, I've got a few more shots from other angles.

Oh, the power of words.

What would the scary kids do if you did enter?

...

I just got back from another trip to Arizona (one of my favorite states) and I took a ton of photos. This one's definitely the strangest and most Unloose of the bunch, so here it be. There's just something about mannequins that makes them endlessly bizarre.

Dragons terrorize the helpless inhabitants of LA's Chinatown neighborhood and all this dude on the sidewalk can do is take pictures.

Sometimes camo is scary.

Here is the girl of Weaver's dreams. Notice how she gets low to create less drag...

Something about this horse statue makes it seem a little more "special" than others. He resides in London Tower which is in London, this one city in England.

I realize this one's pretty far from the normal stuff I post here, but I really like it so here it is. It's from the Porsche room at the LA auto show.

I don't normally post photos of people here, but I couldn't resist this one. This is my friend Alex mugging for the camera (as usual) near the corn field in downtown LA.

A chunk of land in downtown LA was threatened by sprawl and dumpy buildings. Some people got upset, so they sought a solution. The solution? A woman/philanthropist said she'd save the land under one condition: that she be allowed to plant corn there. This is the honest-to-God truth.

Yet another photo from Scotland. This is in Edinburgh. It is a place where some Scots go to worship and pray and sometimes daydream and other times see what's the highest number they can count up to before they lose track of where they were in the grand scheme of numbers.

I've finally finished my friend's web site, so I'll be back to doing things Unloosen-like very soon. I'm also moving into a new apartment this weekend and I'll have an extra room in the apartment devoted to work (AKA an office) and a lady-type person around the house to make living a little easier in general.

This was in a town near a Loch (not of the Ness variety).

Even though I've been back for two months, I'm just now posting my Europe photos. Here's some urban decay from Glasgow, Scotland. Have you noticed that I like the urban decay?

Ok, I realize I've been absent for a while now, but I've got plenty of great excuses, one of which is another web site I'm working on for a friend's documentary. This is a picture I took in France in September.

Here's the deal: you know he's French, but what's the deal with this guy? My suggestion to spur site activity is to have people submit stories about this dude (fictional, unless you sold him the snazzy orange hat and know his true story). Ten Pork Pony t-shirts to the person with the best story. I'll pay postage. Please post the stories as entries, not as comments. Please reserve comments on this photo for commentary. Please. Please?

I just got back from a ten-day trip to Europe and I'm freaking tired. I saw this in a cemetery near Saint Paul, a walled village in southern France. I used a wide-angle lens and, as a result, this photo looks very "space."

I forgot to post this. I took it while I was in NYC in late June. The sticker on the post reads, "Artists Are Sissies." Obviously makes more of an impact when the photo's bigger.

He proved to be an elusive subject but I finally caught Cha-Cha on camera. This one is for Weaver. Whenever Weaver or I make a reference to a man called "Cha-Cha" this is who we are talking about.

I recently spotted Dio in the area. I didn't get to meet him, though. He turned into a wilderbeast and ran off as soon as I snapped this picture.

Taken at a fire scene early in 2004. This one has never seen the light of day and reminds me of Dio.

this one is from early last year.

Taken on a cold and wet day in early January of this year. I was driving around looking for anything to take a picture of. My favorite part is the bigfoot figure moving through the bottom of the photo. I waited nearly an hour for someone to walk down that street.

I saw this sign in east central Pennsylvania and I was nonplussed. I still don't know what to say.

The Hope Cemetary in Barre, Vermont is home to one of the country's most interesting cemetaries. This is a favorite of mine, this man and his wife, a dreamy poof of smoke.

Curtis's Ribs in southern Vermont is a restaurant in a school bus. My guess is that this is Curtis, but I've been wrong before (once).

I'll be traveling until the 30th of June, so my site participation will be spotty until after the 4th of July. I'll probably post a few more photos soon.

An insatiable masochist, Hot Dog Boy wants to be eaten. I wonder if that crazy cannibal guy in Germany's still taking volunteers?

A little late for Mother's Day, I know. but what mother would not like this image slipped into their Mother's Day card next year? The saga is complete, just like the new craptacular Star Wars trilogy.

a rare studio shot using a co-worker as a model. First in a series of two. Guess what part two is called.

I see many a strange thing in my travels as a coal region photojournalist. This one fried my tiny brain.

-Frog-

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I took this photo about a month ago in Chinatown, just north of downtown Los Angeles. It's a big rotating sign above a cake shop. The bluish-gray background is the sky.

During a recent trip to Arizona, I took this photo in a small town called Jerome. Perched atop a mountain, Jerome's an old mining town that's been taken over by artists and hippies. It's a place where restoration, decay, and conservation seem to coexist. This picture shows a few dying buildings near the edge of the very steep mountain.

Frog, a photographer in east-central Pennsylvania, sent us these photos back in 2002. A giant Polish man plays the role of our Lord and Saviour in an Easter celebration, proving once again just how strange the anthracite coal region is. - CL