To be brief, I'm writing a book. It is probably the main reason that I haven't posted anything new in ages.
As it is now, the format consists of a few things. The bulk of the "story" will go first, shrouded in secrecy for now, then there will be no less than 50 short stories (some you'll recognize), a miscellaneous section of other nonsense, and perhaps one or two sections that are up in the air now. This will not be a thin book, as it is already over 100 pages and I feel that I am about 20% finished. All I will expose for now are the titles of the short stories that are ready to go, along with titles of stories on deck.
DRINK YOUR ASSHOLE
KNOW KARATE
MISSING GIRL
PANCAKES
DRINKING BUDDY
THE EBONY LIZARD
TIME CANYON - EPISODE 4
SECT (formerly "No Title")
BEAUTIFULLY SCARRED
PAPPY'S GOT AN ITCHY TRIGGER FINGER
WHAT WAS, WHAT IS
A MAN OF HIS TIME
*DREAM STORY
*EASTER GAME
*IMMORTAL HAIR
*MACHO VANITY
PROPHETIC BICUSPIDS
AFTERNOON SKELETONS
EARTH FLAG
GODVIEW
JUST ONE OF THOSE DAYS
BAR SCENES
CANDY THIEF
JUNIOR AND THE HEAVEN CAKE OF ROLLING FALLS
DAYTIME DADDY
THE DAY I ALMOST KILLED 5 PEOPLE AND A COW
THE DAY I DID KILL 500 PEOPLE AND A COW
HAPPY PLACE
TRIBUTE
* = stories that suck
Stories ready to be written (working titles):
SIX- cowboy thing
TIRES- revenge gone awry
APPLES- sappy shit
HITCHHIKERS- could be cool
TRAPPED IN A WELL- giving me problems, but it'll be fine
THE TEA PARTY-going to be 3 stories all called this, you'll see
EROTICA- too sexy for this post
DOUGLAS AND COOKIE- odd, may also be made into a short film, actually
BEER POWER VERSUS EL MATADOR- a lost gem
THE MAD WHACKER- don't ask
DUNCAN MANOR- soap opera
Who knows when this mess will be completed, but completed it shall be.
Kudos to you in your literary endeavor!
(Seemed like the properly pretentious phrase to blurt.)
I've always thought that all of the elder statesmen [sic, probably] of Unloosen stroke Pork Pony could each put out a book or two and it'd be a great moment for the literate world (which seems to be shrinking with every second that another American Idol clone is on the television). It's great that you've decided to start it off with seemingly gargantuan proportions.
I'll purchase a copy, my good man.
Yeah, we could be our own McSweeney's-like empire if we wanted -- and were motivated enough to get off our duffs and write more.
Probably, Craig. I wish I had the money/time to devote about eight hours a day to creative endeavors dealing with the site. I think I could get something done if that were the case.
Weaver has worked up some pretty good stuff for this book idea of his. Something he mentioned to me involved Dennis Hopper and a reprisal of his role as King Koopa, but I can't say any more.
Yes, the size of the book will be a bit on the gargantuan side, but I think that there will be something in it for everyone. Even if it is a line, really. Mostly nonsensical stuff that I have pretty much thrown on the site already for people who think as we do. However, some of the stories I have been currently working on have been longer, with a bit more dialogue, which is somewhat new to me. I'm having a lot of fun with the short stories, actually. Having said that, I can't wait until they are completed so I can get to the main "story", which will be a blast! A few more staightforward stories are needed, I feel.
I finished "Tires", the "Well story" and "Duncan Manor" since last post, with DM actually being funny and having the potential legs to appear in future scribblings.
The Hopper/Koopa thing Chris mentioned... Well, I have a plan for that thing. More of a personal challenge than anything else. Let's just say "Where will my mind take me?" and leave it at that.
What I may do later on is post little preview clips of stories and other things as I get further along, just for defication and laughter.